Wednesday, March 10, 2010

The Upside To Kidnapping a Corpse?

Tired of recycled plot lines?  Sure, as a writer you can manufacture a spectacular twist, but if too imaginative the audience probably won't buy it.  If kidnapping a living person has been overdone then why not take a page from recent headlines and base a tale on a true crime story!  

Today, this particular headline captured my attention:  Three months ago the body of deceased Cyprus ex-President, Tassos Papadopoulos, was snatched from a cemetery and held for ransom.  This got me thinking about what was going through the mind of the kidnappers and what the upside to stealing a corpse might be.  Here are a few things I came up with while brainstorming their ingenious plan.

Rule #1: 
Choose an important figure whose death and burial is highly publicized.  This way the location will be easy to find and most likely noticed if disturbed.  It's difficult to get money for a decaying body if no one reports it missing.

Listopia Advantages: 
There's no kicking, screaming, fighting or hair pulling and you don't need to worry about fancy or remote accommodations.  However, you may want to reserve a cool place, preferably somewhere refrigerated.
There's no extraneous expense such as feeding, or paying some mope to guard or transport the package. 
You don't have to worry about providing 'proof of life.'
If things go wrong, you won't have to make good on a threat to kill a loved one.   
Listopia Disadvantages:
Getting your hands dirty while working the graveyard shift.
The smell.
Dragging around a bunch of dead weight.
Figuring out what the opposite of 'proof of life' is?
Making sure the family gets the ransom demand.
Is there some way to make a person more dead if the family refuses to pay?
Apparently, non-payment was the end result to this true crime story.  The family claims they never received a ransom demand and therefore, never paid.  For three months the thieves were stuck with a rotting corpse and no cash.  When their ingenious plan was thwarted, they did the only thing they could – rebury the ex-President and leave an anonymous tip.  Acting upon the information, the police discovered the stolen body inside another grave beneath a thin layer of soil.  A DNA test confirmed it was indeed the late Mr. Papadopoulos.

Although death may not be funny, stupid criminals and botched schemes can be!

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for joining the list. If you wouldn't mind pasting it to your blog as well we can have added exposure. Thank you, Charlie.


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